much to say...
haven been blogging quite awhile...
was trying to accumulate my thought den write a long post...
finally hiaz....
just went to visit my facebk...
saw michelle wall...
just feeling sad....
did i leave any memories 2 u all 4 all this 4 years?
cause i dun feel i have...
ur display pic cut up the photo which had me inside...
maybe im just thinking too much cause it might not be fittable...
another thing is when i c ur status and it always kinda of sad as it always didnt have me in it...
im like feeling very down now sia... wad memories had i left u???
NONE at all???
after the pop is like ur and me didnttalk much liao...mostly hi and byes....
am i still counted a friend or always just a platoon mate?
next problem...
tat day u didnt turn up...
ur not calling or even finding me up....
is it after cca stands down im no longer someone in ur eyes liao?
u didnt even attended sch today... no calls nothing...
does pop means end of friendship?
weeks ago u always call but now?
nothing... even my mum's asking he never call u liao har?
den i tell her ur m.i.a...
hiaz feeling like no one is close to me in school anymore....
hope u would call up and say y i never call u up?
last thing...
2day receive my emaths test paper...
like i failed?!?
i was 60% sure i will pass and in the end i failed!!!!
kaiwen stop thinking its all abt the careless ness when im not putting in my effort like last time...
even sam can get higher den me...
ms chang was like saying she was happy cause we deserve it larh...
hiaz... wad she said really give me a min motivation 2 study...
so 2day after class went home to do homework
life's screwed....
wished zai understand how i feels now....
stuck with my summary so decided to write my post first...
sighs... guess i will try to force myself to study this 2 weeks to come until end of midyear exams....
until den i shall den watch another drama as my own reward...
jiayous kaiwen... im the only one tat says jiayou 2myself sia...
no one said to me b4...sadded...
guess i will seldom be writing post liao unless i got stuff impt to say...
byes...............
does POP means end of all friendship?..?..?
drama_crazy1994
* confused on such a life such a relationship...
shack~ness
i feel like dying now!!!
feel like breaking down feel like banging my head on th e wall
its just the fate me and my sister is staying 2gether
its just the fate we are in sjab 2gether
i d k larh
feeling very tired now...
now like jeremiah is like fighting a indirect fright with me i feel mentally stress out
charlene's breaking down cause no one doing os with her but studying fir the test 2moro
like i asked her and she didnt wan me to help?
now she's stress out
freakk sia...not we drag our own tim one lorh but ppl dunwan cooperate den drag one
i know its partly our fault until now we haven have a aop!!!
argh!!! den just no my sis tell me th e vivo thing cannot work out...
like seriously emergency so i told charlene and she likehackliao
only jeremiah think of a solution...
i tols mich as she was also on9
den jeremiah told me i stree mich up too...
like wad sia im just telling her the progress happening now?
den jeremiah wanted me to pass down message to team leaders and like i dun have all their no.
since mich is one of them i told her to pass it down
from wad i heard from jeremiah she is like breakking of the stress too
like wad sia i seriously dun know wad stress mich gets cause i think i get more then her?
like just passing message to close ppl also feel stress??
no offence or wad larh
but i dun thinkim doing smth very wrong
i dun c the fact tat im making mich too stress when we made the decision for her just passing intructions on...
hiaz just tried and had the feeling of fan lian!!!
hate and love today...
at first all was right den now all was wrong!!
u are changing ... ur different already...
forgotten who u **** most liao...
together always goes will apart...
im afraid one day it will turn out in tat way...
why cant the freakking tear just explode?
crawling in agony away...
first day realise the changes tat was unseen...
hiaz... stupid seniors...
1. tell use a plan to celebrate 'boss'[charlene didnt have tat authority too...shows bise~ness]
2.alpha dun need fall in
3.either u join in the takan or go home...
its like forcing us lor.... we cant possibly join in tat shows crossing the line lorh....
stupid... like damn damn angry...
must well dun write in the notebook...
onne big family=no celebrating cadet b'day as a core?
onne big family= PNCOs are invinsible names...
den for wad sia...
i wonder y must bravo be treated so differently from alpha?
i can tell seniors tat we are the freakking last batch tat have the takan style...
bravo leh? once come in gd life!!!
damn pissed off!!! fine!! alpha is invisible!!!
who's alpha har?
invisible 10 ppl?
plus y shermaine and kailin can be there when we cant???
like super uber unfair lorh...
started dao~ing all ppl who join in the celebration...
mdm jas walk pass us just now ask us y we never join in the celebration and i said in her face
'someone tell us go home mah...go home lorh!!!'
idiot!!! if their plan was go home=stay in sjab room
den they have freakkingly failed in telling us tat message!!!
failed!!! FAILED!!! FAILED!!!
HACK LIAO DUN WANNA WRITE LER...
bye!!!
dao~ing ppl from now on~
drama_crazy1994
* tks mich and charlene for the wonderful dinner...
~ silence is the best way of ignorance~
days when im so lazy...
hiaz... dun feel like doing any work sia larh...
got meeting almost everyday so come back late...
ur like on9 but i dun wan to act despo to talk 2 u so shall force my eagerness back...
heehee.... finally all alpha's attending meeting except the [on m.c] jik yew...
haha damn haapy with the attendance...
haha not gonna write anything abt the pop here although no one reads this blog but just wanna to keep it a secret until 17 comes...
i send sir ian email he haven reply...
actually hoping he cant come cause it shall be very weird...
heehee...
die 2 day's test think gonna fail bith a and physics test liao...
dun wanna think of it anymore...
argh... temptation does kills...
feel like watching bai quan nv wang and xia yi zhan de xing fu
but i know i will get addicted but i ask ppl they say just watch lor...
cant someone strongly just say no?
argh...no one's back until now...
guess someone is just argh!!!
nvm...dun wanna say.... sound like i freakking want attention...
hahas... wells sometime bah...heehee
eh i normal human and human needs attention to keep them going bah...
shall surpress my feeling for this moment...
2moro got last commendation practice...
going home late again...
tata!!!
remember surpress the feelings...
drama_crazy1994
100% full commitment
hmm...just had a long day in sjab last routine training...
yesterday damn funny sia,
i finnaly bought all my d&t components thingy then we walk to muji then eat dinner...
den the funny thing happened, when we were walking back to sim lim tower the carpark, me and mummy cut through bugis street
me: mummy c tat t-shirt so small.... zai zai can wear a not har?
mummy: u ask the shop keeper larh
[walks to toward the auntie on the phone]
[c's us and put down the phone]
me: mummy how to ask har?
mummy:[asking the auntie] zhe ge ke yi gei gou chuan de mah?
auntie immediately give my mum the white eye and doesnt want to reply her...
haha... embarrassing!!!
2 day in sjab talk a lot..
mdm tiff askus to decide we want the pop still or not...
had a heart to heart talk with alpha,
most of the gurls cried[except me]
hiaz i feel so sad sia larh...
like odd one out nt crying...
but actually teared...
decided to carry out pop...
mdm say whoever a bit is not commited she will cancel the whole thing...
hiaz so i tried to persude the never come training jeremiah to give his 100% commitment...
so hard to talk to him larh!!! argh!!!
i seriously talk to him untill wan bang wall liao...
cant he just freakkingly believe tat all of us are ready to commit liao?
hiaz need do d&t ler
sighs...
100% commitment from jeremiah pls!!!
